I realized in reading the title of this blog that I wanted to talk about many things in life that go along with a longtime marriage. I have been so incredibly blessed in my life. I have had struggles, a few of which I have started talking about here. Along with those struggles though, I have had amazing blessings in my life.
My family, the blessing they have given me. The smiles, the grief, the trials of raising kids. All of it was a blessing to me. I have two wonderful children and two of the most beautiful grandbabies in the world. ( of course they are to me!)
The joy I get from seeing my oldest become a parent is incomprehensible to me, this child who challenged me every day from the moment of their birth has become the most wonderful parent imaginable. I am learning from this child. They have shown me where I failed in parenthood. They have such patience and such a joy in parenting that I am not sure I had. My early life was hard, we were very poor, and I think we just worried about feeding and clothing our new family, that I think I missed out on that time with my babies. I let the pressures of every day consume me with worry, and because of that worry, I focused on working and trying to make our way up in the world. I was not a bad parent, if you ask my children they will say I was a good mother. But when I look at my child and their spouse, taking the time to play with their children, taking time to enjoy them, and not worrying about the mess in the house or the chores that need done, I am blessed.
I realize in that moment that they took all the good things I taught, and they learned them, PLUS more!
It gives me a peace knowing that this child is going to be all right, raise a great family and pass on the values that we believe. The first thing, most important thing, is family is always first. They got that already! I see it every day.
My dear second child came into the world in a very rough way. I had to be in bed with that child the whole pregnancy. When second was born, it was an emergency, I lost about half my blood supply with a placenta previa , and second did as well. It was touch and go for a while, but in the end, second came home after almost a month. Second is my sensitive child, my overthinker, the one who DESPISES making a decision, because OMG what if it is the WRONG one! I wish I could help with that trait, because it holds one back in life. It is holding second back in life. But handsome wants me to back off some, and pretty much let second be for a while to catch their breath. Our families gave us the big boot when we graduated high school, it was go to college or get out in six months. So Handsome and I got out. ( did I mention ever we are high school sweethearts?) We chose a hard road to hoe, but we grew some amazing crops out of this hard row! We decided early on, that although we love our parents dearly, that this was not something we were going to do to our children. I mean if they get to be thirty then we talk, but we were going to try to support them until they felt safe to leave the nest. I do not believe my second bird is ready to fly quite yet. I am not ready yet to push #2 out of the nest. I am respecting my husbands decision in this matter.
I also am mother to three fur kids as well. They bring me joy everyday. Dogs bring total and unconditional love, they love in the way I believe God loves us. We may disappoint them, or leave them, or even yell and scream at them (not my babies!), and at the end of it all, they forgive us, and show us an unconditional love that I think no human can give. I think only God can display an unconditional love like that. My dogs bring me that joy at the end of the day, the love, the warm hello, the snuggle goodnight.
So dear reader or two :) this is the very basics of my family. I have so many stories to tell that include these wonderful people. The most amazing thing about these two children, they have been taught that we have the power to forgive, and if we can give forgiveness we should. My two lovely children were witness to the disaster that was Handsome's mid life crisis. He said some very hard things to them when he was in the fog of his affair. But these lovely children that God blessed me with, they forgave, unconditionally. I think they forgave much easier than I did!
In that moment, I knew that I had succeeded in raising good children. I was proud of them.
I am proud of them every moment of every day!
Until next time dear reader or two!
Peace to you.
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